Mouse's House

this may just be doable.

2011-05-11T09:55:00.000-05:00

chucks just make it right

2011-05-11T09:42:00.000-05:00

Believe in Miracles but don't Depend on Them.

giving your life

2011-05-11T08:27:00.000-05:00

i received a phone call yesterday from one of the lights in my life. my immediate reaction was "my heart is breaking and save this person." i have the room. i have the time. i have the heart. is that enough? it should be.

but i also have a husband and two kids who i have/want to care for as well.

i struggle with this off and on in my life.
the what if.

what if i was supposed to be the cool trendy mother teresa caring for the broken in spirit?
sometimes i think "what if?"

or why do they not feel the need and urgency to open up the blessings we have in order to help others?

there's no question about all of that in my mind.
i just do.
they just don't.

i don't need to think about it.
they do.

i don't need to have all these adult feelings about it.
they do.

if we have it, give it.
if i have time, give it.
if i have enough heart, give it.

Being used by God to make a difference in this world for Jesus is the reason God made you and me in the first place. We were created with a God-given design and a God-honoring purpose. From your very first breath, God had a plan to use you in a way that can uniquely and specially touch another person’s life.

Am I letting God use my life? Am I wiling to Commit to being “used” by God.

The question is ... how do i incorporate this into my married/mom life? how do i balance that. how do i do what I know God has called me to do without making mistakes in my marriage and home life?

When you think of what HE has done for you, is this to much to ask?

my father's daughter recipe 1: vegetarian chili

2011-05-09T19:22:00.000-05:00

as i had said before. my goal is to make one recipe a week from gwyneth paltrow's cookbook. so, i started today.

i made vegetarian chili. it was very easy to make. it made my kitchen smell like my grandmas house, which is was amazing. and my family enjoyed it. i asked for highlights and for lowlights.

highlights: tomatoes were great
   spices were great
   the whole thing was great

lowlights: i wish their was meat
   i wish their was meat
   i wish their was meat

Getting all my fresh ingredients prepared

Cooking the fresh products and spices

Canned ingredients

My daughter helping out

Stewed Tomatoes added in with Chipotle and Simmering

Done and getting ready to serve

Vegetarian Chili

Recipe One Down for Week One

Table Setting for this meal

So, I also made gourmet grilled cheese for this meal. Potato bread, sharp cheddar cheese, pepper jack cheese. I shared this meal with my husband, kids, and my mom. My son ate two bowls and sopped up the leftovers with his grilled cheese. I have one serving left and will be bringing that to my best friend Lauren tomorrow, I shall see what she thinks.

Gwyneth, if you are out there and reading this, I am excited about this journey. I am committed and ready to learn something new. Most of all, I am praying for incredible cherished moments for myself, my family, my friends, and my soul.

Next week is Butternut Squash Soup. (I didn't start out with this one, because I could't find a butternut squash, but alas, I found one today!)

Allowances and Imperfections

2011-05-09T19:07:00.001-05:00

"The essence of a true friendship is making allowances for all the imperfections."

What am I inspired by for Spring?

2011-05-03T21:40:00.000-05:00

i'm thinking my spring/summer uniform is going to be boho/mod/floral

Mother's Day Gift Ideas

2011-05-03T12:40:00.000-05:00

Themed items are the best, here are some ideas

On the Cheap:

Place Setting Theme
1 plate
1 bowl
1 cup
($1.99 each at Target, and they all match and are cute)
put her fave drink in the basket for her cup, put her fave soup in the basket for her bowl)
Explain that every woman should have their own special place setting for quiet moments. You can throw in a small candle for her setting too.

Music Theme
Homemade CD of your fave songs or songs that remind you of her, Yankee Candle or Tyler Brand of Car Air Freshener (hallmark carries these $3), Little Snacks for the Car (100 calorie packs $4 at target)
Explain that you want her to always know your near while she's in the car

Spring Theme
light weight scarf from old navy, ross, or tj maxx (always under $10), sandals from old navy ($15) , and a bottle of opi or essie nail polish that is spring themed ($8 at target)
Explain that she is the Spring in your Step in Life

Tea Theme
Tea in a canister from Inspirations Tea Room ($12) , tea cup ($5-$7 at tj maxx) , tea lovers devotional (mardel or barnes and noble)
Explain that you want her to enjoy some quiet time and relish the moment

Workout Theme
cute water bottle from target in the camping section ($15) or from tj maxx or ross ($7)
workout tshirt (old navy or ross less than $10) and a good pair of workout socks (tj maxx $7, they have a great selection)
Explain that you want for her to know how proud of her you are for taking care of herself

Gift Card Galore
$5 to starbucks, $5 to sonic, $5 to chic fil a, $5 to subway
Explain to her that it's a treat day for herself and no one else!

Fun Jewlery
go into Dustee's on Penn by target, forever 21 in Quail Springs Mall, charlotte russe in Quail Springs Mall and pick up some accessories for less than $20 total
Put each item in separate boxes and then stack them and wrap them!

PRESENTATION IS ALWAYS KEY. YOU CAN SPEND LESS THAN $10 TOTAL ON THE GIFT AND MAKE IT LOOK EXPENSIVE. A BLOW DRYER AND SHRINK WRAP CAN DO WONDERS. IT'S WORTH IT!

You can put stuff in a plastic container, basket, shoe box wrapped in paper, and then shrink wrap! Done and Done!

or you can go the bath and body works route since they are pre packaged. the flower route. the route of ordering and sending. easy enough.

the CORAZON

2011-05-03T10:06:00.000-05:00

Understanding this spiritual heartbeat is a part of the journey God has for us; it helps us understand God’s intention for our lives.

The Bible refers to the heart as the driving will or innermost being.

Surviving and Thriving

2011-05-02T11:25:00.001-05:00

let me just start out saying this ... Coffee with friends is so good for the soul.

met up with miss J and miss L this morning for some much needed dishing. homemade apple oatmeal which i don't even like, but for some reason love hers now. and some dunkin donuts coffee! YES! why is this necessary and so good for the soul, well, a comment was made by miss J, "you can be surviving, but then are you thriving?"

Interesting to say the least. This is purely from a woman's POV. it made me stop in my emotional tracks and just completely put me in emotional deer in a head lights brain mode. whoa. as women we get so stuck in surviving we don't allow ourselves to thrive in the process. we don't reexamine where we are at in the survival process to allow the thriving to happen and be present in the thriving.

here's the deal. we have got to get into the word and surround ourselves with people like miss J and miss L in order to realize these things. i would of never examined that thought, been present to take it to heart and know that in order to survive i have to be present enough to allow thriving to happen. i know it seems simple and elementary, but putting action into that thought is what takes the most work. being conscious of this process is what takes work.

This is where the scripture from 1 Corinthians 10:13 (message) comes to life.
"No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will NEVER let you down; he'll NEVER let you be pushed past our limit; he'll ALWAYS be there to help you come through it."

Love and Respect : I am starting the journey oh and cooking too

2011-04-28T08:12:00.001-05:00

Great storytelling so far

Classic Advice

3 Commitments are being made in my life right now.

1. Soak in and read "Love and Respect"

2. Cook one meal once a week from this cookbook starting the week of May 1st

3. Keep it Simple and my mind Sane!

I am pretty good at following through for a few reasons.

When I let others know, I don't want to flake out (people pleaser tendencies).
Also when I write it out, I am more apt to commit than if I just say it.
And, finally ... I tend to follow through because i don't want to fail

I love a new commitment. I love a new journey. The challenge though is keeping myself in check and keeping it simple and my mind/heart sane.

So, of course I'm thinking, what outfit do I wear for these new tasks, and I'm sure you were thinking it too. So, for inspiration, here we go. (yes, this is how my brain functions, and before i continue, just know this, i am not materialistic, i believe in the look good/feel good philosophy and when i have a theme of some sort to follow (structure) then i am 100%.. don't judge! we all have quirks)

AND FOR COOKING ...

AND FOR READING...

So, how does this commitment spiritually benefit my life? Well, the book on love and respect is obvious. better marriage. better model of marriage to the kids. oh and making God smile because he would be thinking "thanks for doing marriage right!"

As for cooking, i'm learning something new. i'm pushing myself out of my comfort zone. the family is happy and i possibly could get G.Paltrow to maybe come cook with me after i've made it through her whole book. (for inspired by julia/julie) and it works for me because it would be (paltrow/patty) Im just sayin'...

Songs for my friends ... inspired by Jen H

2011-04-27T16:47:00.001-05:00

this is what inspired me to write this blog, my daughter Aryssa. she is the light of my life, i love her. she's the greatest. she completes me. she inspires me to wake up every day. she is the sunshine in my life. best.daughter.ever

so my daughter got on and wrote what you see above and i decided to leave it because it'll be one of those moments that i look back on when she's out of the house and be grateful for that moment.

anyway... this blog is inspired by jen h. check out the blog that inspired me at http://jenhartnsoul.blogspot.com/2011/01/favorite-songs-of-people-in-bible

So, here we go!

Lauren S Waka Waka

Jen H Dancin' Machine

Ginny M Firework

Heather C Fly Girl In Living Color

Angie L Black Betty (Sheryl Crow's version, simply because we wanna rock out)

Christy B Reflections

Summer B Try a Little Tenderness

Shannon F Beautiful Day

This is it for this post. but there is more to come.

hmmm, what is mine? i'll research that one!

Spring is here. So is the newness in life. and I'm 32!

2011-04-27T15:44:00.002-05:00

I turned 32 yesterday. Hmmm. What do i think of that? Well, here's the deal. I don't look 32, so I think that's why I enjoy aging. Kudos to the Latina roots! Whoop! Regardless of that, I have always enjoyed aging. I love the process. I love the wisdom that come with each year. I very much cherish the journey. Good grief, 31 was ... well, a challenging journey year to say the least.

Here is what i know for sure without hashing out all the crying dirty bleah details. God is good! God is good! God is good!

Jesus makes it all better.
I have found that He really doesn't
EVER give you anything you can't handle. It sometimes stinks what he thinks you can handle, because i have often said this exact quote to him, "REALLY?!?!?!?!?! YOU THINK I'M THIS STRONG?" and then i shake my head and cry my eyes out and then joy comes in through the storm. that pretty much sums up the year of patty at 31 years of age. so now, the NEW 32 is ready!

speaking of "new". Spring is here. Spring is ready to take on the old and ready for the new to blossom. the roots have taken and now the blossoming happens. oh how joyous! thank you Lord for this season of life. i wonder why we don't allow ourselves to go "there" through each season. that is why we have them. that is what molds us. that is what creates wisdom for our individual stories. if we can't be in them and allow God to truly narrate, then what is the point? walking in freedom when the "DUDE" has IT in control is more liberating then trying to do it on our own. i've been there, done that.

HUGE WASTE OF TIME! THIS IS HOW IT FEELS INSIDE AND THEN LOOKS ON THE OUTSIDE! eventually it looks like this. not good. and why. why. why. why would you want anything else. doing it on your own doesn't allow for growth.

enough of the wisdom. so. what else does this new season entail? new outfits of course. or inspiration for new outfits. here is what i am inspired by this year.

loving the girly vibe and easy colors

loving the ease and softness of this

what can you expect this season? a lot of scarves and accessories. tribal ethnic inspired things. and vintage with newness twist. but always do what feels best on yourself. don't follow the rules. just makes sure it fits properly. number one key in fashion. it doesn't matter what it is, just make sure it fits great. not to tight. not to loose. just right. if it doesn't. DON'T get it! i don't know how many times i see women with a great outfit but it's either too small or too big. most of the time, it's to small. it's okay to go up a size, everything fits differently. it makes a huge difference. and rant ended.

Sabbath: Keep Calm and Carry On

2011-01-26T11:39:00.000-06:00

This is Sabbath To Me.

The continuation of the Wise Old Owls heart moments ...

What does this even look like in my life. Well, some days His Truths are loud and clear and some days I am not willing to listen. I have somewhat of a rebellious streak in me. Surprising, I know. :) Bottom Line, I have learned discernment. I have been molded by his hands that never tire, which is crazy and beyond what my imagination can fathom. I wonder, where does this patience come from. The holy spirit of course. i'm pretty sure that is where it comes from. The holy spirit is patient. i just sit and think, how do you deal with me sometimes, and then i remember, oh, you love me like no other. thank you for being so consistent in that, my life depends on it. which has brought me to one word that has been engrained in the deepest parts of my heart this month : SABBATH.

What does Webster say about this word? A day of rest and worship. Hmmm, what does that really entail for me, for your life, for those who don't yet believe, for those who don't see it as part of life? I can't answer for anyone else, but I do wonder about it. I would love to go around for one month and ask all sorts of people what that means for them and then take pictures of them having sabbath. i would like to figure out what makes what they do or perceive as sabbath a sabbath day for them.

Sabbath

for me? hmmm, well. coffee/latte/hot tea is always involved. looking at pictures of family, friends, memories, you know ... studying every detail and going back to what was happening at that moment, or just praying for them. music. it also entails a little thing i like to call "Rockin' it with Jesus" (so cheesy, i know) Sitting on my rocking chair on our front porch, hot drink in hand, blanket, stillness, and the sounds of his creation. that would pretty much be what my sabbath is.

It fits my devotion for today ...
This was nature of the Sabbath. Gift, not burden.

Which leads us to all sorts of questions, does it not? Where do you find your worth? Is the rhythm of your life sustainable? Is it life-giving or life-draining?

You see... Sabbath is not a luxury. It is not a burden, something that gets in the way of “life.” Sabbath is a sacred, life-giving rhythm. It is essential to creation, to re-creation. It is a sacred space to be entered into…a space where we slow down, reflect and remember. It is a place where we can breathe. Be. Still. Celebrate. Connect. Unplug. Refresh. Restore. Live fully present.

One of these days my Bible will look like this. My hope.

I tend to not take Sabbath like i should. i tend to sometimes look at it as a burden, even though i cry out for it. i forget the sacredness of it. i forget that it was such a priority for God and if i am trying to be more like him, then i should make this sacred too. once again, he loves me enough to say, "HELLOOOO DARLIN', i made a day for you to breathe. be still. celebrate. connect. unplug. refresh. restore. live fully present. quit complaining, it's your own fault for not following through. "

Sabbath in effect/affect for 2011. soon to become a lifestyle.

Selfless Faith 2011

2011-01-02T22:51:00.002-06:00

Selfless: Having, exhibiting, or motivated by no concern for oneself

Faith: Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

The wise old owl has been speaking to my heart lately about selfless faith. It was more evident today than it has been in a long time. I think the old owl has worn out his hoots on me and is being patient.

Reflection to coming soon ...

Fall is here! Life has been, well ... In a Season

2010-11-10T09:19:00.007-06:00

It's November 2010! 7 months since i've blogged. what? really? ummm, yeah, i'd say so. where to start? let's start with this.

We are still baby-less, I've been mad at God, it's been a process, but a roller coaster process and I know God will be enough...but right now, He's not. This too shall pass.

I am still for cupcakes, even if they are everywhere now, I appreciate a great cupcake and a latte for sure

I have gone with the motto "Fake it till you Make it!" but still trying to live by my other goal for the year of "Simplicity"

Ministry is busy and fulfilling and ever changing (which i love, 80% of the time)
My kiddos are growing in the Lord and
I've been very proud
My husband has been traveling a lot and we haven't been in the best season in our marriage (we are working on restoration and falling back IN love with each other. we love each other, but the IN love has fizzled out, marriage is a process, we get that, it's time to renew)
I have taken quite a few trips to Austin with my bestie and have had a blast

I've had a women's bible study called Jonah totally rock my world
My friendships are growing and I am meeting new people that i would potentially like to make my friends (it's worth the time and effort)
I am learning how to do leadership in ministry and as a woman,
I am still consumed with magazines about fashion, life, indie stuff, music, and recipes/organization
I read an amazing biography and finished it
I have an ache in my heart to be closer to family and be back in Texas
I miss my in-laws and my brother in -law like crazy too
I wish my brother and his family lived closer so that I could honestly fill this void of a baby with my nieces (and i love my brother like no other, but i'm being honest in the real reason of wanting his family here)
My dog is still alive and getting older, sleepier, and fatter (i love my tiger boy)
I am still serving as s REV leader for youth ministry and my girls have gone from one extreme to the other (searching and seeking other religions, turning away from God, being hungry for God, being totally complacent, being totally on fire) It's been a definite challenge, but I am believing and trusting God with his word from 2 Cor 9:6-15, I will keep on keeping on and loving them where they are at
I've had two very good friends challenge me, and I am forever grateful for them
I've cried a lot
I've laughed a lot
I've been pissed a lot
I am still working on living SIMPLY in all areas of my life (emotionally, spiritually, materialistically)

The fall weather makes me totally happy. Why? It's the season of Thanks and Renewal. It's crisp, spicy scented, lovely, and calm. Not to mention the food, latte's, outside adventures, picture moments, family, and an open heart.

What keeps me going? What makes me want to Fake it till I can Make it? BEING ABLE TO FUNCTION!

It's called making a choice of life or death!

Life in the places that I feel like I am dying to no end.

Life in the days that all i want to do is scream and lay in bed.

Life in the moments when all i can do is look up and say "God, you better do something big and quick! Because i can't handle it anymore."

I choose life, and if that means faking it till i can make it, well, that is my Fall Season and this to shall pass.

I found my 1st one!

2010-05-25T13:26:00.005-05:00

I did! I found it! My first one! A GRAY HAIR! Oh, how the wisdom is pouring forth it's powers upon my head! I asked God for it and he gave it to me, gray = wisdom! It is super obvious too, and I don't think I'll get rid of it anytime soon. It is right in my bang area where my bangs do their split/part thing that bangs can do. It's ultra bright too.

I have to say. I am okay with this. I actually laughed and then smiled! I wasn't giddy or anything, it was just funny. I mean I wasn't expecting to find my first gray hair at 31. I don't really know when I was expecting it. I looked up quotes for gray hair, this one stuck out to me. "Gray hair is a blessing - ask any bald man." I guess I should take that into consideration. I am not opposed to gray hair, I actually think it's pretty. I have always thought that gray hair on women is pretty, as long as it is shiny and well kept and NOT frizzy! Ugh, please put some serum on the frizz ladies! I think a lil natural frizz is fine, it's natural! But, when it's full blown, you didn't put ANY product in it......please put a lil'. It is so worth it!

***i.e. the picture below. Her before, kinda bleah, the after, YES!

So what does this all mean? Where am I even going with this? Here is the deal, I found it, I laughed, I kinda like it, I can change if I want to, I can leave it if I want to. I can pull it out for pete's sake if I want to. But, for now....I will just acknowledge it, embrace it, and still laugh about it. I do know this for sure, and I will let THIS quote sit for a bit in my head! "Silver hair is a beautiful crown found in a righteous life." Proverbs 16:31 (GWT)

With that said, I will leave it at that!

My 30 Moment

Keep on living. Keep on keeping on. Silver hair is beautiful. So I must be doing something right...cause if I have one coming out, then that means there is some righteous living going on in my life!

Perception and The Wise Old Owl

2010-05-19T20:11:00.003-05:00

I have always been open to the wisdom that people possess and I have always been open to hear the perception they have on life. I like to compare this to living in the 100 acre woods with the Winnie The Pooh characters. Who did they always go to for a clear perception on situations? Who did they always go to for wisdom? Owl! His sign outside his door said, "Ples ring if an rnser is reqird. Plez cnoke if an rnsr is not reqid." (of course Christopher Robin wrote this for him)

Owl is described as considering himself the most informed animal in the woods, although he likes to make long winded speeches and hates to be contradicted, his heart is always in the right place and he takes his philosophy very seriously.

I tend to gravitate towards people who also posses these qualities. I am fascinated with them. I am easily charmed by them. (not in a creepy way, more of a pour your wisdom into me way) I love that his door sign is pretty specific and I feel that most people who have a lot of wisdom would like the same sign imprinted on their head, or at least have a t-shirt that states that. When an answer is required, a bell needs to go off, it's your lightbulb moment. When an answer isn't required, you can just talk about it and it'll come to you knocking you upside the head!

I feel the same way about the verse in the bible with Jesus knocking on the door and waiting!

Revelation 3:20 (msg) "Look at me. I stand at the door. I knock. If you hear me call and open the door, I'll come right in and sit down to supper with you."

Do you see the correlation? When you need an answer from Jesus, it's in plain sight in black and white in the Bible! When you don't need an answer, all you have to do is knock and boom, He is right there to knock you upside the head in a good way! He's ready to eat and hang out! He is just that cool. He is just that wise. He is just that loving.

So, what stops us from actually seeking that out? What stops us from hiking through the 100 acre woods and stopping at the wise old owls tree? What stops us from the long winded speeches? What stops us from the heart of the owl?

outfits i am inspired by right now. outfits i wiill be looking for on the cheap of course.

2010-04-24T23:15:00.003-05:00

wedding. what i would of changed....or wished i'd had

2010-04-24T23:00:00.007-05:00

i went to a dear friends wedding today. it was wonderful. it got me thinking, the wedding world...it changes minute by minute....what would i of changed in mine???????....well, mainly my clothes.

i would of splurged on a reception dress and shoes....so that i could continue to wear that same outfit, since i wouldn't be wearing my wedding dress again.

so, above is what i would of most certainly bought for my reception dress. as for my shoes.....

as for my decor in my hair.

and so with all that said..... i of course decided that i would of changed my bridal shower dress to this........

these are the only changes i would of made. wait. i actually would of taken more time walking down the aisle so that i could make mental pictures in my heart/head of everyone that was there. and i would of had more pics taken of james and i with people.

just a few thoughts and inspired by being at such a great wedding today.

My 30 moment:

I can still like that kind of stuff, think about it, and be inspired by it.

glorious day. what does that really consist of for you?

2010-04-23T13:42:00.005-05:00

these past few weeks have been a whirlwind, but a fun chaos. i work better under situations that end in a very clear result. i don't like working towards things that have no clear end. no clear purpose. it's a waste of energy for me. this is where faith comes in. there are some things that i say/think, "really, is my energy worth this?" and that is where faith comes in, and gives me that energy needed to keep making "it" worthwhile and purposeful.

all of that is so much more fun when laughter is had, cupcakes are eaten, and its glorious outside.

i am sitting here at cuppies and joes on nw 23rd st in okc. i have made this little nook my little space. my back to everyone behind me. women that are chattering. probably moms who have a few hours away from kids, the house, husbands, and they have a reason to get dressed cute and put on make up and be an adult sassy woman. bravo to them, oh how my prayer is that they would make that a weekly event, not just a every 3 month event. i know that in order for them to get here, they had to make major plans with major details with major stress added to it.

as they sit here chattering away, i wonder, "are they really allowing themselves to be here, be present?" enjoy the glorious wonder of it all. is it worth their time and energy for this day to have purpose? are they thinking that with laughter, cupcakes, and the glorious day that they can make this day very clear as to what they want it to be. i know, without a doubt, they DON'T want it to be about thinking about the kid, the husband, the house, or the family drama that their mom just told them about on the phone.

how does that even happen? how does a woman lose her "glorious day?" how does a woman get to the point that laughter, cupcakes, and beautiful days are far and few between.

now, don't misunderstand me, i know that kids and husbands and homes bring joy. i love that in my life. but that doesn't define all of me. what defines me as a woman is more than that.

moments like this define me. my independence to come to a coffee shop, drink an iced chai, eat a cupcake, blog, people watch, enjoy the sunshine, stop at a local shop called mister rabbit, take a few photos of myself and other things, let my face enjoy the sun for a bit, and then let the world be my playground by myself, that defines me as a woman.

how do women lose that? why do they let that happen? i am a huge activist for women's rights. not the feminist wearing combat boots, no bra, yelling, cigarette, no make up feminist.

i am the chic who doesn't mind asking her hubby to open a jar of pickles, i am the girl who has never pushed a lawnmower in her life because i don't like the ungirly-ness of it, i am the girl who loves sparkle, i am the girl who won't change her tire even though i know how to.

with all that said, i am also the girl who will camp and not shower for 3 days, i am the girl who doesn't mind sweating, i am the girl who will bait her own hook to fish, i am the girl who is not afraid of spiders or snakes, i am the girl who will do her best to beat boys, i am the girl who will change the tire if it is the last resort or i actually get stranded on the highway with no one to help.

so, what does all that mean? i consider myself to be an activist for women who forget who they are as a woman before the kids and husband and house came along.

find her. get her. embrace her like the prodigal son. get her the best robe. get her the best piece of meat. don't ever let her go. it's worth it.

my mom taught me this. my mom broke those spiritual chains of bondage and instilled in me to never ever forget who i was. what i liked. what i enjoyed. what i can do by myself and enjoy at the same time.

this doesn't mean that submission has been thrown out the window, i feel liberated and walk in freedom being submissive to my husband. what i am saying is this.

people have fallen in love with the woman you are, not what comes along with you. God created you as an individual before anyone else came into your life. so, if he did this, don't you think that it's important to remember who that "being" is that he knitted together? i know that life helps shape and form who we are as woman, but my goodness, don't let your whole life be just kids and husbands and homes.

talk about other things than just that. make your day clear and purposeful. enjoy it.

make it glorious. okay....here comes the cheesy part! BECAUSE YOU ARE GLORIOUS!

i had to say it! (you have to say it like you are at a women's conference) hahahaha.

days like this remind me of that activist in me. no excuses women. seriously. quit feeling guilty. there is no guilt in loving you. loving what God created in you before all the other things. no guilt in enjoying what he knitted together when it was just you and him.

i never feel guilty for doing my own thing. why? i come back a better woman for everyone in my life that God also created me for.

My 30 Moment....

Take your glorious days and run with them, guilt free. Clear. Purposeful. Laughter filled. and throw a cupcake in there for extra sweetness. and Mom, thank you.

Cupcakes+Jesus=Obsessed

2010-04-18T23:26:00.005-05:00

I have always loved cupcakes, but I really started to become obsessed with them when I was 29. I love the art of them, the different cupcake shops, the simplicity of them, and most of all, the taste and flavor of them. The word "cupcake" is even fun to say! I love how kids say "pupcakes". I have visited all the cupcake shops in Edmond, and OKC. I have to say.... my absolute favorites, in this order are

- Sara Sara Cupcakes

- Saturn Grill Cupcakes (Sweet Memories Bakery)

- Cuppies and Joes

- Cupcakes a go-go

Now, I am not very fond of cupcakes a go-go, but it's in Edmond, OK, and I don't have to drive to far if I need my cupcake fix.

I am looking forward to trying Green Goodies on Western in OKC, they specialize in vegan, gluten free cupcakes.

Here is the deal, I appreciate the detail that is put into the names, the flavor, and the creativity of the cupcakes. I savor the dense, moist, creamy taste of them. I feel special in their shops, they are all different, and have their own unique little quirky kitschy feel.

One thing is for sure..... even with all the little extras, the delectable taste, the atmosphere created, and the time it takes to make all of it happen, it is still a cupcake. No matter what, it's still a cupcake, yet I still stay obsessed! They make me happy. I enjoy them. I look forward to having one. I am always up to visit a new place that sells cupcakes. etc. etc. etc.

So, what does this have to do with Jesus?

Simply this..... Jesus never changes. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Same concept with cupcakes. No matter where they are made, served, eaten, decorated, the unique name they are given, they are all cupcakes.....and so delicious, hence why I am obsessed.

Jesus just wants you to be obsessed. To savor his every word, find his unique kitschy vibe to be engaging, pursue the "newness" of his new shop, learn the different names He has, delight yourself in Him and He will give you the desires of your heart.

I have this absolute sure vision that when I get to heaven, Jesus will for sure sit down with me for a latte and a cupcake!

Of course, I have thought about what I would wear......and this is exactly a perfect cupcake/latte date outfit with Jesus!

I know, I know, why would I even think about something like this and search for it....same reason I can combine Jesus and Cupcakes....I mean...come on!

My 30 Moment......

My obsession with cupcakes....well, if it can lead to a better understanding of how incredible Jesus is, then bravo.....I will continue to eat and savor cupakes and Gods word! Amen to that!

Things. Love. Sigh.....

2010-04-13T23:47:00.003-05:00

What am I loving right now? (inspired by Jen H)

the band She and Him.

Rompers for the Summer.

2010-02-16T23:52:00.003-06:00

Yes, i will always love hello kitty. Yes I am 30 and will always wish that I could have the same style of Tarina Tarantino and that awesome fun pink hair.

My 30 moment.....

Hello Kitty and Pink Hair will always be fun!

2010-02-16T23:52:00.000-06:00

Yes, i will always love hello kitty. Yes I am 30 and will always wish that I could have the same style of Tarina Tarantino.

Simplicity and the abundance of it

2010-02-12T11:20:00.007-06:00

I know that I am 43 days late on writing my 2010 blogging. but, here is where i am at. i had lunch with a woman whom I admire and she asked me, "what is your life about right now?" i simply answered, "simplicity" and trying to figure out how to make that work in my life.

i took this photo at a place called "cuppies and joes" it's one of those little treasures in OKC. this is my favorite room to be in, and it's this little nook in the house of cuppies of joes. you are surrounded by books, games, old chairs, and that feeling of "ahhhh, i can relax, the simplicity."

Simplicity: websters definition: the state of being simple, uncompounded, umcompromised.

The wit of man, The Simplicity of a child.

Why?

What happens from the age I am at now to the age that I lost simplicity. How did it happen that I allowed the doing and going to happen more, and the simplicity to happen less?

Here is where I am at in 2010. I was given a book from the same woman I admire, that is called "Simple Abundance" It has been a life changer for sure. I understand that some of it is written in a new age spirited way, but I take what she says as spirit as the Holy Spirit for myself, personally. I also am aware that this book is quite old, and most women have read it or heard of it. This is not the case for me, and rightfully so. God always presents things like this in my life at just the right season.

This book is broken down into months. February is all about the Authentic Self. Todays challenge? Go back to the 10 year old girl you were. She says that age 1o is probably the last time you trusted your instincts. You didn't listen to the opinions of anyone, because you had your own. Once upon a time there weren't second and third guesses. She's all grown up now. She's your authentic self ad she's waiting to remind you how beautiful, accomplished, and extraordinary you really are.

I will need to think about this one, age 10, 5th grade.

Back to Simplicity..... i am at a point in my life where I simply am putting it all into perspective. the day and day out routine. not so much the big stuff. i have a clear understanding on the big picture. it's the small mundane picture that tends to take over my life. i am a big advocate on women not forgetting their true self. i have started to lose some of that and it's very disappointing to my heart and the well being of who i really am as a woman. I WILL NOT allow this. I am putting my foot down and allotting myself the pleasure of reintroductions.

How will this all play out? Who knows? I will start small and make sure to pray, breathe, and laugh through the process.

It is one of those things that you all of sudden become so clear of, that it simply makes sense and you just HAVE to do it. There is no second or third guessing. It's going to happen and it needs to happen.

I am raising my mug to simplicity! An abundance of it! May it become a lifestyle and not just a life change.

My 30 moment.....
I believe my yearnings are blessings. My choices are as authentic as I am. I will realize that my life is meant to be a joyful sonnet of thanksgiving. (Sarah B Breathnach)

road trip and having full internet access

2009-12-18T14:16:00.003-06:00

oh the times have a changed.

i'm not knocking it, just acknowleding it that's all.

i would of NEVER seen myself writing this blog while on a roadtrip to Texas while my husband is driving. normally, i would of saved this input for my journal or talked about it later and thought about blogging it. but i'm actually doing it.

some fond roadtrip memories of my childhood.

schlotzkys sandwiches

mowtown music

burger station burgers

slim jims and slurpees

mad libs, license plate game, billboard game, i spy, alphabet game, m.a.s.h., taking pics of people asleep, reading, listening to my walkman, upgraded to a cd player

falling asleep and waking up to a hurt neck and red face with lines on it

tejano music playing

my brother playing the piano on the dashboard while great balls of fire by jerry lee lewis is on

my mom making the car dance to rock me amadeus

my brother learning to drive from dallas to san antonio and choking out the car (standard chevette)

hearing the word a**hole for the first time and i thought that was the mans name and my mom happen to know him, so i said the word and asked her how she knew his name, and my brother and mom laughed hysterically and i still get teased for that one

my brothers snake getting out in the car and going under my moms seat

my brothers lizard getting out in the car and we couldn't find it, and found its skeleton a few months later

my brothers hamster getting out in the car and trying to catch it

my brothers fish dying on the way to san antonio (do you see a pattern???)

Look @ me now, blogging away and ate whataburger with my husband and kids. It's funny to think back on those moments in my life and to think how far away my life now would be, and now i'm here.

My 30 Moment.....

memories are great and so is the future as long as you laugh and love the people around you.

Gosh Lady......

2009-11-18T12:04:00.004-06:00

Okay two things! This is my "Gosh Lady" Commentary.....

I have been told to love the unlovable.

I have been told to tolerate the intolerable.

I have been told to keep my mouth shut if I don't have anything nice to say.

Where in the world to women's brains go to when another woman is being nice and saying excuse me politely.

Let me set up the scene for you with "Gosh Lady" drama 1.

I am @ Ross, (of course) and I am browsing through dresses, and I do not have a cart, nor do I have anything in my hand. This means that I am not in anyway a burden to anyone else around me, since it's just me and my purse.

The rule of thumb is this, when you are trying to get by someone to get on the other side of them to look at a rack of clothes and there is hardly any room to move behind them, you politely, almost quietly and sweetly say, "Excuse Me" and smile and not make eye contact.

I mean, everyone knows how to do that and what to do when someone says that. You are to give a fake little laugh, smile at nothing and move over for the person. Here is what you DON'T do. I say "excuse me", and then she acts as if she doesn't hear me, so I give her the benefit of the doubt and say it again, "excuse me" but a little louder and more sweetly than before, and the lady does this....

Scoots herself back more, so I can't get around her, and looks over at me and then looks over at the clothes and DOESN'T MOVE.

GOSH LADY! so i push myself into all the other clothes that are behind me and i do go around her. and stand right next to her and look at the clothes on the rack next to her. she doesn't budge. it's gonna come out, i can hear it in my head, "GOSH LADY!" but it doesn't, I think, what if she's a member @ NORTHchurch, what if she is one of my kids friends moms, and then I think, what if she is? She should hear me say, "Gosh Lady." but i don't, i'm blogging about it instead.

Here it is ladies and gentlemen, when someone is behind you and need to get around you to look at clothes on a rack, and you can always hear them say, "excuse me" , do the right thing and move so they can get by and then you won't be blogged about.

Drama Scene #2 Wigs

I love them, I have nothing against them, and then i found out that I do have one gripe about them. I don't know if its necessarily about the wig or the person with the wig.

Here's the scene.... I am at Dollar Tree and of course there are 25 people waiting in line because only ONE cash register is open and of course everyone in Dollar Tree is a complainer, so about 5 people go start asking around if another person can open a register, all the while asking other people to save their spot in line. Why is it that the people who go asking for another register are smokers with holiday, college, or winnie the pooh sweatshirts on? Anyway....my point...

So, there I am observing people as I normally do, especially in this kind of situation, and in walks the Wig Lady. Whoa was my first thought. Here's the thing though, she was dressed to the nines, I mean, she was a Stein Mart Lady dresser, but she didn't buy it at Stein Mart, she actually bought the brands of clothes from the actual brand name store, but there was one thing that i couldn't stop staring at.... and it's only because she got very close to me to look at something on a shelf. (not to mention, i'm short and she's tall, so she's not paying much attention to me as i look up at her)

Her Wig was like old doll synthetic hair that had been matted up and made into dreads, but it wasn't dreads. and she had black color stained hair dye lines around her scalp area in the front of her hair/wig.

My "Gosh Lady" thought reflex was happening, because I thought, "really?" you obviously know how to put yourself together and you look great, but what is up with your wig, Gosh Lady?!

and by the way, no she wasn't one of the people who went looking for a cash register, and I lost that bet with myself, I thought for sure she would.

My 30 Moment

I am entitled to my "Gosh Lady" reflexes and have enough discernment to not say it out loud.

Rolling on the River

2009-11-18T08:52:00.003-06:00

Some days...I feel like my life is going as fast as Tina Turners legs when she sings Proud Mary. She says, "I think you might like to hear something from us that is nice and easy, but you see we never ever do nothing nice and easy, we do it nice and rough. Were gonna take the beginning of this song nice and easy, but were gonna do the finish rough."

I feel like that right now.

Going, Going, Doing, Doing, and it wasn't until last Monday did my life have a new meaning and purpose and clarity.

I love how God works like that.

He makes sure that all is taken care of, even though he had it all under control before then. He makes sure that all the easy parts are nice, and all the rough parts are nice. Somehow, Someway.

I felt as if I was at a standstill in life, I felt as if I was a zombie and to be honest I was ready to give up. Give up on life in general. Not the give up mentality as in suicidal, the give up as in, this is becoming to hard, this is becoming to much, this becoming a life joy killer, this is becoming draining, this is becoming like a circle where you go around and around and around and there is no stop or way out.

You see, the honest truth is this, when your life calling is wife, mom, ministry and home, your job is never ending. It doesn't stay @ the office. It doesn't stay @ your inbox on your desk. It's a heart of the matter job. I believe that it does take a certain kind of person to work in ministry. I truly believe you have to be on your "A" game in order to succeed and see, feel, and act on the bigger picture of what Gods kingdom is all about, as well as keeping it at the heart of the matter in your own heart.

It's a hard gig. It's one of those bittersweet things. You have to check yo' self before you wreck yo' self. We use this endearing term in the office as a joke, but really...... think about it, you really do have to do this. It's not an option. When your living life in ministry and taking care of the home, and being a woman of God, along with all the other things that come along with being a woman, I do have to check myself before I wreck myself.

So.....that is what Tina is talking about when she says, "If you come down to the river, I bet you gonna find some people who live. You don't have to worry if you got no money, People on the river are happy to give."

So, that is what Jesus is talking about when he says, "Be Still and Know that I am God."

Rolling down the River is always going to be nice and easy, and nice and rough. Living life with and for God is going to be the same thing, and being a woman is going to be the same thing. Clarity is Good!

My 30 Moment?

I will keep on Rolling, Rolling, Rolling on the River.

husbands and coffee

2009-10-10T08:28:00.010-05:00

What is it about drinking coffee with someone you love that makes it so delightful? I mean really, how does that become intimate. Why do we always see the young dashing man asking the beautiful woman if she wants to go and grab a cup of coffee in the movies, or the Bible group that says, "Let's do this over coffee", or the the two best friends who look forward to their coffee dates, or the time you get to sit with your parents and just enjoy the early morning and drink coffee and talk, or the 1st cup of coffee on a camp trip. What is it that brings such intimacy?

I know for me, I truly passionately enjoy drinking a cup of coffee with my husband in the morning. We have this settee in our "coffee shop" that we call the goddess chair. Well, two people can sit in it and we some how fit ourselves to lay in it feet to head with our laptops and coffee. We each do our own thing, look up and talk and then look out the window @ the deer and different birds that come by.

So I am thinking about this, because drinking coffee with someone takes time and effort. Time because you can't just gulp down a cup of coffee, it's hot, you have to sit and wait and sit and sip and sit and wait and sit and sip. So what do you do with all the "waiting" time, you talk. Effort because you have to think of something to talk about and carry on great conversation, whether it's about the game last night (like how awesome the Texas Longhorns are), your job, family, what God is doing in your life, celebrities, (like how cute jimmy fallon is), or other random things in life.

It truly takes time and effort and in our day in age, that is to much to deal with. I have heard wise people talk about this, I will be sitting @ a coffee shop and I listen to their conversations. The wise people talk about how we don't slow down, as they sit there and drink their coffee together, and they talk about how we need to relax a little bit more and don't let life pass us by, as they sit some more and drink their coffee together. They talk about how the old days used to be, as they sit there and drink their coffee, they talk about memories of those who have passed and gossip about those who are here, but lovingly, as they sit their and drink their coffee.

What are they doing? What are they talking about? What are they feeling? These Wise People? I wonder that. I have a heart for the wise people here on earth. They make my soul warm and energized. Wisdom is something I am constantly seeking after. It's so good for the soul and it makes you richer in life. Not rich with money, but rich in your soul, wisdom will last longer than money. You can pass down wisdom, and money, but wisdom is going to stick around more than money.

Back to my whole topic though. What makes the time people have over coffee so intimate? I believe is simply this ...... we are stopping for just a moment (1 hr,2 hrs, 30min) to just BE! To stop and really invest, which turns into intimacy. We connect. We are authentic. We let our wall down for just a few hours and get energized by it. We build a relationship. We are calm.

My 30 Moment .....

Don't just stop to smell the roses, Stop and enjoy a cup of 'jo, and sip and wait, sip and wait. It's worth it, it's latte-tastic! (oh, how cheesy, that's okay though) Put your whole self into authentic fellowship with someone and just "BE".

Reflection from 9-9-09, Today it's 10-9-09

2009-10-09T08:18:00.003-05:00

Today marks one month. One month ago that our Baby went to be with Jesus. Where are we now? Where have we grown in one month? What am I doing with my time to heal?

Lots of reflection is happening in my heart today. Good healthy reflection, and some tears too. I am sitting @ Java Daves in Edmond, in a very cozy chair, my feet propped up and my skinny vanilla latte by my side. I am ready to reflect. I am ready to write some things down.

I have been journaling, but I haven't actually put my thoughts out there in regards to my miscarriage. I met with a friend for lunch a few days ago and I was telling her that I don't mind being asked if I'm okay, or how are things since the miscarriage, but I also don't volunteer the information either. I am completely fine with talking about it if someone asks me, but I am not okay with just bringing it up, unless it's to my husband, mom, or dog. :)

I have been allowing myself to do something with my time to heal instead of allowing time to heal me, cause that silly to me. I can't remember where I heard it, I think my Pastor said it, "They say time heals, but that's not true, it's what you do with that time to heal that makes a difference." That was powerful to me and I have had a different perspective in how I allow God to work in me as a woman to use this "time" to heal.

Here is the thing, I am not one to wallow, or get angry with God, or have a pity party and play the "victim". I am the one who says, "God, how can you use me with this new chapter in my life?" Boy, has he ever allowed me to use this for His Glory! I thank God for that though! Amen.

I am leading a class right now for some incredible women, but this class has helped me so much too. It's based off the book written by Dr. Leslie Parrott, called "You Matter More Than You Think". Well, I originally committed to leading this class in May, and didn't feel that this was meant for me, I just wanted to pour into other women and build them up. I have a heart for women to know their true worth and for them NOT to forget who they were before they became a wife, mother, etc. They were 1ST created as a woman of God, and they forget that after they become a wife and mom, anyway, God has used this "time" to heal. He has brought this band of women together with great fellowship and authentic discussion and celebration moments to "heal" my heart. We were reading Romans 5:1-5 and it is powerful. Rejoicing in our sufferings is sometimes hard, but when we do, it brings perseverance, and then character, and then hope, and HOPE DOESN'T DISAPPOINT.

I just got this email from my husband, I love you and can tell you that if i look at the past 30 days (aside from a few moments here and there) that this journey has brought us closer together and for me even closer to God. I have the utmost confidence and faith that He will bless us with a healthy baby soon."

Now, that is HOPE that definitely doesn't disappoint. How great is it that with this new chapter in our lives, we lose a precious little one, but gain so much more in return? Grace and Mercy and Love of God, that is how. How is that I can be so @ peace? I truly believe the words from Jeremiah 29:11!

I am remembering what Duckie says to Andy in Pretty in Pink, he says, "It's called a sense of humor, you should get one, there nice."

I want to sometimes say to people, "It's called Faith, you should get some, it's nice."

My mind is sometimes boggled by the fact that people don't understand why I am not angry with God. That is ridiculous to me, why in the world would I be angry with God? He loves me, He loves our family, He has plans. I can live in freedom that HE HAS IT ALL UNDER CONTROL. His word tells me "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." It doesn't say, just sometimes with my heart, only on Friday with my heart, only when things are good with my heart, it says, with ALL my heart!

The actual definition of ALL is : the whole extent.

I mean think about it, when I paid for my awesome skinny vanilla latte, I would be a little ticked if I only received half of my drink, but paid the full amount for my drink. I'd be like, "oh know you didn't" and then I'd get all latina on them. Well, it's the same concept, Jesus didn't die for me in full, for me to turn right around and only give Him half of my heart, He died in full for me and the least I can do in return is give Him ALL my heart. Get it? So, duh, it's totally insane for me to be angry with God. That's not even an option.

I look @ it this way, who would be the BEST babysitter ever? God!

Yes, I do have my moments of sadness because of the loss, BUT there is a time to weep and mourn, and then there is a time to dance and laugh. I looove that. One moment I am weeping and mourning, and the next, welllllll, laughing and dancing are a definite in my life. God knows how to comfort and have a rockin good time! He gets the whole, "put your big girl panties on and deal with it" concept. I know that might not be the "holiest" of terms, but.... for a gal like me, it makes sense. I am not pushing myself to "get over it", I am simply learning what to do with this time in my life to do big things for Gods kingdom. I am taking it all day by day, opportunity by opportunity, and not overwhelming myself.

We have an AMAZING support system with incredible people. I'd give shout outs to all of you, but I hope you know who you are. You have been a huge part of the equation to this journey. You have been the salt and light in our lives and we are so grateful.

What's next you ask? Prayer. Breathing. Faith. Calmness. Hope. Laughing. Love. Lattes. Fun.

My 30 Moment......

from the word in Jude..... "build yourself up in your most Holy faith, and pray in the Holy Spirit. Keep yourself in God's love.....". Build my Faith. Pray. and Be in God's Love.

Just a Thought or two....

2009-08-31T16:25:00.003-05:00

Lately I have been feeling not so hot. My humidifier, tissues, and hot tea have been my best friends.

Actually, my hubby has been great making sure i have all these things.

I must say, when I am not feeling well, I go into Princess Mode. I am mainly on Diva Mode, but Princess Mode comes out when I'm not feeling well. I am actually a little more sweet. proper, and quiet. Hmmmm. weird.

I have been resting and elevating my head. It is hard to sleep this way, but I seem to end up not in that position when I do wake up. hmmmm. weird.

I sometimes wonder, what am I complaining about? These little mundane things? But, they are kinda funny to me.

Picture it. Your elevated while you try to sleep, with pillow upon pillow making you elevated. Stuffed up nose, humidifier on and buzzing, tissues galore.

It reminds me a little of Cameron from Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

"When Cameron was in Egypt's land, Let my people go."

So funny.

I had my girls over today. When I say my girls, I mean my girls from youth group. I consider all of them extra daughters of my heart. We watched 17 again. It was cute. I just enjoy being with them and hearing them gush about Zac Efron. It soooo takes me back to when my friends and I would gush about Johnny Depp on 21 Jumpstreet or Luke Perry on 90210 or the one and only Jared Leto on My So-Called Life. Oh, now, that was the Zac Efron for me, Mr. Jared Leto. He was the one.

It is so funny to hear them just talk and to know that I have a part in their lives. I love each of their hearts individually. They are all different, but share a common bond of God. To want to grow, know, live, and love Him.

They really have made me proud in the women they are becoming. Some struggle more than others, but it has shown me a very, very, very, tiny glimpse of the heart of Jesus, and how much he loves His children no matter how long it takes to get "it". I can only imagine. (sing it from the song) :)

My 30 Moment

Stop and Enjoy. Rest and take care of yourself. Don't push to hard and just love. Authenticity is what matters most to teenage girls. Remember to stop and laugh and gush about a boy on a movie, even if you are 30!

Andie, Duckie, Blane, Stef, and Leona.......

2009-08-28T08:08:00.000-05:00

My all time favorite movie is Pretty In Pink, by John Hughes. I saw this movie when I was in middle school. It came out in 1986. I was born in 1979. So, it was a while until I actually saw it. I had a TV in my room growing up with cable, I know, I was spoiled. So, one Saturday afternoon, my life changed for the better.

I saw the Saturday afternoon movie and it was PIP. I never turned back after that. I saw everything that John Hughes produced. So, at a young age, I knew who the Brat Pack was. I knew all the 80's songs. It helped that I knew most of them anyway, because my brother is 6 yrs older than me, so....I was cool, I was in the know! ;)

Well, I watched this movie without a break. I didn't want to get up. I was blown away. I loved it. I loved the whole story and plot.

This movie also introduced me to Otis Redding. There is a scene where Duckie comes into the record shop and lip syncs to "Try a Little Tenderness" by Otis Redding. Needless to say, this is also my all time favorite song ever, and I got into Otis Redding at a very young age too. Which, i think is a wonderful thing. As soon as it was appropriate, i made sure to have my daughter view my favorite movie. She likes it, but doesn't love it like I do.

I can quote it line by line. I tape recorded it old school style. I had the movie on VHS and I sat my tape recorder next to the TV and recorded the whole movie, just so I could listen to it on my stereo and memorize every line.

Some of my fave lines you ask.....

Drinking and Driving don't mix, that's why i ride a bike.
Blane, his name is Blane, Oh, that's a major appliance, not a name.
It's called a sense of humor, you should get one their nice.
Can I admire you today?
I'm off like a dirty shirt.
You said you couldn't be with someone who didn't believe in you, well I believed in you, I just didn't believe in me. I love you, ....... always.
This is an incredibly romantic moment, and your ruining it for me.
Andie. hon. listen, it's after 7pm. don't waste good lip gloss.
I'm not nine Andie. I know that.
APPLAUSE. APPLAUSE. APPLAUSE.

So, what does any of this even mean? Well, there are some things in life that lead to other great things. You just have to be willing and open to explore what that is. For me, being introduced to Otis Redding was amazing. He is my favorite musician. Being introduced to all these coming of age high school stories, well, it was great. I love the 80's classics. I feel like they seriously don't make movies like that anymore. Now, it's all about the Sex. In the 80's movies, sex was involved, but it wasn't all about it, the movies that are made now that are coming of age stories, are ALL about sex. It gets old and tiresome.

What happened to the characters like Andie from PIP? She didn't fall for the popular boy who had all the girls. She didn't dress in a way that showed everything. She didn't compromise herself, well, at first when she didn't want Blane to see where she lived, but then she got over that, and then he asked her to Prom and then they kissed in front of his car while his lights were on, so it was all romantic and teenage like. Oops, sorry went off track there.

Anyway.... My point....

My 30 Moment....

Some things will never go out of style and they only get better and better.

The Letter Tonight and How the Holy Spirit Moves Quickly

2009-08-26T22:04:00.000-05:00

Tonight @ Revolution Student Ministry, Pastor Brian spoke about our Crossroad moments in life spiritually. Well, we had some great questions to ask our students, but the Holy Spirit had other plans in mind.

One of my youth group girls handed me a letter from another one of our youth group girls that didn't make it tonight (she had asked this girl to give it to me), and it basically said this, in so many words, without getting into major detail, "I am depressed, and feel that my negative energy shouldn't be around ya'll. I don't want to mess up your happiness with my negativity like I did with my family. I also feel like I am out of it and nothing matters, and I don't have purpose in life."

This is coming from a girl who's background is of being in a mental rehabilitation center for a month for trying to take her life and for depression.

She used to have a relationship with Jesus and she has felt his presence before when she was younger, and then something happended in between that time and now for her to turn away from him. She strayed and then came back, then strayed and then came back. She went to camp this summer @ Turner Falls and said she gave it all to Him, but then a month later, it was back to how she was living life. Drinking, cutting, and such.

She gets a weekly postcard from me and she said that it helps her so much to receive that in the mail, and that she posts it on her corkboard.

She has opened up to me about most things, but she isn't ready to be held accountable.

She is open to much prayer, and also to wanting to change, but she hasn't chosen that yet.

Well, this was our groups crossroad moment.

We all wrote letters to her after I read her letter aloud to the group.

We then layed hands on her letter and prayed for her.

I know a mighty work is going to be done and I know that the Holy Spirit is moving in mighty ways with this situation.

God is in control, and it will be an amazing testimony for the girls in my group and for this girls life as well.

Talk about a Crossroads moment! Boy, did He give us one tonight. Thank you for that Lord!

So what is my 30 moment?

To always be prepared to listen and take action even if it's not in the original plan. Always have on the armor of God in order to stand up against the enemy.

The Deer @ the Bird Bath in the Morning

2009-08-26T07:53:00.000-05:00

Every morning, without fail @ 7am we have deer in our backyard. well, today i got to witness the deer at the bird bath drinking water which happens to be located right outside my bedroom window. our family is fascinated with this and we get so excited to just watch them. they will catch us and bob their head up and down, perk their ears up real high, and just stand like statues, as to say, "We aren't really here, you can't see us."

My husband will spend his morning time with coffee in hand and a comfy chair in our coffee shop. Well, it's our breakfast nook, but i've made it into a little coffee shop lounge area instead of a breakfast area. Anyway, he loves this part of his day. just sitting there, watching the birds, watching the deer, and getting his sense of nature and quietness fill.

As i was watching this one deer at the bird bath this morning, i thought, "God really does take care of EVERYTHING." I know that, but I really know that now.

I am pretty sure that deer wasn't thinking this morning, "Where will I get water, Oh my, will I ever find water today?"

No, this deer, relies on what God gave him, his senses.

Why do we not do this?

Why do we fret and worry and fret and worry and waste so much energy on the things that are already under control?

God has it ALL taken care of. Not only do we have all 5 senses, which are marvelous in itself if you think about it, but we have the love of Jesus Christ in our hearts, minds, and souls.

I love the verse from Matthew 6:25 -26 (The Message) that says, "If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don't fuss about what's on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of the God. And you count far more to him than birds. "

Just like my husband gets his fill of nature and the beauty of it, i'm sure that God sits in his make shift coffee shop with coffee in hand, and gets pleasure out of watching us have faith in him, feeling our heart at peace in him, and following through with living a God-worship life, and drinking the living water He has provided us everyday!

So what is my 30 moment?

Take the time to have some real faith and truly believe, understand, feel, and know that God has it ALL under control!

i'll start blogging.

2009-07-29T14:44:00.000-05:00

i haven't blogged at all about my whole 30 stage of life. but i will be. that is a 30yr old promise.

30 deserves a story

2009-05-02T21:56:00.000-05:00

As of a week ago I turned 30. I have been looking forward to this for two years. There is something about this age that I am completely joyful about. I can't completely pinpoint exactly what it is, but i do know this. it's a peace that has come over me. a peace i've been looking for. i really don't know why i think that this peace all of sudden comes with the age 30. but my mind set was and is that, so that means it just "is" and the "is" is peace.

i have to say, another thing about this though. 30 means i get to use eye cream. i've been looking forward to that.

i know this may sound silly, i know some women think i'm crazy. ugh, i'm crazy about being 30, der der doy.

i've decided that 30 deserves blogging.

30 deserves a story.

30 deserves full attention to what is really important and what isn't

30 deserves the true meaning of peace and joy.

not just the meaning, but the action too.

here's to 30 blogging.

here's to 30 and the story.